Jerod's Mayo-nnaise ready to hit shelves

When it comes to promoting food, the New England Patriots were already well covered -as it were - with Rob Gronkowski's breakfast cereal "Gronk Flakes", but now comes word that New England's Jerod Mayo is spreading around his own tangy brand of promotional excess.

Jerod's All-Pro Mayo, a line of gourmet Mayonnaise set to be merchandised at select Boston area grocery stores and online at, is being marketed to be as versatile as the Patriots' tacking machine himself, coming in three distinctly different flavors according to a report from

The beefy defensive captain has had some sparerib time on his hands since a torn pectoral muscle ended his season prematurely, so he's introducing Kickin' buffalo, bruisin' bacon, and crushin' chipotle mayonnaise flavors that makes it sound like you'll be picking up your Chiclets off the floor after having a taste.

Mayo comes off as a ham at times, but he's certainly no turkey, nor is he chicken to take a chance in marketing his new product with area retailers - and maybe him dipping his toes into the sometimes bologna world of retail foods will inspire some of his teammates to do the same.

For example, perhaps cornerback Marquice Cole could introduce a new brand of slaw, tight end Matthew Mulligan could market canned stew and practice squad tackle R.J. Dill could promote his own brand of pickles ...

...and it doesn't have to be limited to consumables, as center Braxston Cave and linebacker Brandon Spikes could team to offer tours of stalagmite caverns for speleology enthusiasts and tackle Marcus Cannon could do well to market replica firearms to civil war aficionados.

They'll all just have to be careful not to hot dog it too much, lest they end up with egg on their faces...