The Pride and The Prejudice: Why the Patriots will win, How they will lose


Welcome my friend Al Bedrosian, with his second column for PatriotsLife. The first one was on Kevin Faulk's retirement. This one was an idea we tossed around as a weekly column idea before I started this site. Al would dish out why he thinks the Patriots would win, and how they would lose. The Pride and Prejudice column. Well, now 20 weeks into the season, here it is in it's debut.

The Pride and The Prejudice
By Al Bedrosian

Well, the Patriots are in another AFC title game, and playing the Ravens too. While it seems fairly certain that Brady and crew will simply sweep the Ravens aside in a massive “Pile It On” victory, there remains a lingering feeling that maybe, just maybe this whole season will be an embarrassing failure of epic proportions.

Therefore without further ado, a short description of why the Patriots will win, and how they will most certainly lose.

The Pride

They’re the Patriots…come on.

When it comes to winning the Patriots just can’t get enough of it. They have to win, they need to win, they breathe winning.

As of the last six years one can honestly say that they just haven’t won enough. Sure they won a million games and scored a million more points, broke most of the long standing records in the NFL, have made annual playoff runs, and been to two super bowls. But the fact of the matter is they didn’t win those Super Bowls and simply having a competent coach and an excellent team isn’t good enough anymore; let the Jets worry about stuff like that.

The Pats have been to five Super bowls and won three, this is their chance to go to six and win four.

Joe Flacco Sucks

He does, sorry but he's just not that good, and all this brewhaha about him being an elite quarterback is malarkey.

Now, Ravens fans don’t take this the wrong way, the Patriots dumped millions of dollars into Drew Bledsoe before they realized he sucked. The best thing to do is just accept the fact that you made a mistake and move on from it.

That’s what the other Harbough did and his team is doing fine.

The Prejudice

Ray Lewis

Big Ray is easily the scariest man on earth, now he has got nothing to lose. At the end of this season Ray Lewis will retire, which means it's all over for old 52.

This is Ray’s last war, his last chance to cement his legacy and when it’s all said and done he will most likely have redefined the words “reckless abandonment”. To put this in perspective imagine backing a wounded jackal into a corner, now for some reason this jackal has opposable thumbs, and has gotten a hold of a chainsaw…….that is also a flame thrower.

This is going to be ugly folks, bones will be broken, brains will be concussed, and ACLs will be snapped.

Joe Flacco sucks

Take it from someone who isn’t good at anything, when you suck this bad luck is always on your side. Pundits and fans alike are baffled at the fact that after weeks of horrible performances, Joe can go to a place like Denver and out play Peyton Manning. How does one explain this? Simple.

Luck.

He gets lucky and he wins, and if you don’t believe me all we have to do is look at the reciprocal of the luck equation.

Fran Tarkenton, Jim Kelly, Dan Marino, and Steve McNair were all amazingly gifted players that had everything going for them, and pound for pound they could blow Joe Flacco out of the water, and despite this, none of them won a Super Bowl.

Why? No luck.

Expect Joe to be very lucky this Sunday, like 300 yards and two touchdowns passes to Torry Smith, and if you look close enough you might see Luck hanging out on the sidelines at Gillette Stadium this weekend. He will be standing next to the water cooler smoking a cigarette, and wearing a baseball hat that says “Fuck You”.