I thought this was going to be the week to blow the doors off. I really thought the Pats would use the long week, rest their guys, address the issues, come out and donkey punch the Jets. Alas, another week, another miserable Patriots watching experience. I’m starting to get sick of this shit. Is it too much to ask for a game where Tom lights a team up and we can just be happy?? Why does every week need to take years off my life? Anyway…On to the accolades.
BEST WEEK EVER
Folks it looks like DIDI is back!! I didn’t think the day would come. Heavens to Betsy I thought the little squirty inside of Dion was gone after his last knee injury. Last week he started to show signs of his former elusive self. I was having flash backs to the beginning of 2015. This little guy came of out nowhere and for about 6 weeks it looked like he literally could not be tackled. Then he got injured, and injured again, and it looked like that shifty little gnat was dead. I even thought at the beginning of the season it wasn’t out of the realm of possibility to see him get cut.
He had a couple rushes against the Bucs where it looked like his old DIDI was coming back to life. But I wrote them off as just little glimpses. Like when a 12-year-old dog gets that extra skip in his step that you haven’t seen in years when the neighbor’s cat pokes it’s stupid head into your yard. You want to believe that old pup still has the fire. But deep down you know that dog is long gone. Sunday gave me hope. DIDI was shifty as all hell. In 11 carries he had 52 yards and a tuddy. He was making guys miss and putting DBs on roller skates. For the first time in years he was hitting the hole with authority and rolling off tackles to fall forwards. If he keeps running like this I want the ball in his hand early and often moving forward.
WORST WEEK EVER
And now we look at the RB stable in a much less happy way. Mike Gillislee. I haven’t flip flopped on a human this hard since my crush on Marissa from The O.C. Gilly came into the Pats organization and I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He was the hottest girl in school. All I could think about was taking him to get milkshakes and then going to prom. During preseason I looked at Gilly as an LG Blount on steroids. I pictured him putting up a 1200 yard, 12 tuddy season like it was nothing. Despite his 3 TD performance in week 1, he has done nothing but disappoint me. He’s ODing in Tijuana, hanging out with Oliver, and stealing shit from the mall. (Seriously guys, watch The OC.) Through 6 weeks his 3.7 ypc makes me sick. Since week 1 he has 1 tuddy, and on 3rd and short scenarios he’s about as reliable as the Titanic.
The last 3 games, he’s stepped his YPC up to over 4, which is a start. I actually thought that this game against the Jets could be his first 100+ yard game. Then he made the worst mistake possible. He fumbled the ball like a complete and utter jackass. When you’re trying to prove to Bill and Pats nation that you aren’t a complete bust of a signing, you simply CANNOT fumble the ball. Gillislee got 1 carry after the fumble, and I thought even that was a miracle. I was shocked he didn’t Charlie Brown walk back to the bench to have Bill tell him to take his gear off and Stevan Ridley himself on the sideline. The worst thing for Gilly right now is to start lacking confidence. Fumbling while being a member of the New England Patriots is a quick way to deflate your sails. Here’s hoping that drop isn’t the end for Gilly. It might be too late for him however. His watch might have ended and we don’t even know it.
**Official David Harris snap count through Week 6: 7
**Weekly “Are we sure if David Harris is alive?”: Search has been called off. Preparing for the worst.