Kyle Shanahan says Jimmy G might not play this year

AP Photo/Ross D. Franklin)(Ross D. Franklin
I don't give the NFC too much thought during the year. They aren't my concern until the Super Bowl, and then I will spend Pro Bowl week reading up on who we're playing. You'd think that I should pay a bit more attention to the other conference, considering we're in the Super Bowl every year, but this has been working for me so far.

The last time I saw Kyle Shanahan he was calling for a 7 step drop on second down in field goal range in the fourth quarter of an eight point game. And for that reason I will always have love for him. He took my Super Bowl ring that I had ordered in the preseason, got out a nice box and bag, a pretty bow, added some cinnamon sticks, he went full Love Actually on me.

GifMe
Since then, he flew the coop to head coaching pastures in the Bay Area, where he has won as many games as he has Super Bowls. ZERO. Three days ago, in an attempt to change his fate, he traded for the second best looking quarterback in the league, our own Jimmy G. But apparently Coach Shan, the second of his name, has also taken up stand up comedy. Because today he said he "can't promise" Jimmy will play at all this year.

LOLOLOL. Okkkkkk, bro. K Shan said he wants Jimmy to learn the system enough where he can have some success. I'll concede he's not starting this week, that's for damn sure. He miiiiight not even play until after their week 11 bye. But you know who isn't having success? CJ Beathard. Dude STINKS. You think the fans in the Bay Area, who are off to their first 0-8 start in franchise history, with their shiny new offensive minded coach, are going to be cool giving up a second round pick for a qb who doesn't play a single snap before he becomes a free agent?? Get the fuck outta here.

But I hope it happens! If Jimmy plays on that shit bag Niners team he will inevitably put up worse numbers than he did in six quarters with a stacked Pats roster. Which means the money he will be able to demand this summer will take a hit. So if they bench Jimmy not only does he get to say 'you can't prove I'm not the second coming, pay me as such,' but also the Niners go 0-16 and we get the 33rd pick. Allow me to be the first to say thank you, again, Kyle, for all you've done for me.

But unfortunately, despite some SBLI play calling, Kyle is not a moron and Jimmy will be taking snaps before you can say quidditch. Because even if Kyle doesn't want him to, the pressure from the fans and probably John Lynch will be far too much. Let's just hope Jimmy gets out of SF alive when he does play, considering they don't have a single healthy tackle and their best WR could be me if I felt like it.