Fantasy Fix: Week 2 Start 'Em/Sit 'Em

Sure your fantasy team was blown out week one. But hey, my Fantasy Footballer's, it’s way too early to start blowing up your team and taking up Fantasy Ballroom Dancing. Your humble-but-nonetheless-handsome Guru is here to tell you to remain calm, take a deep breath, pour a stiff drink (it’s 5 o’clock somewhere) and relax. Megatron, Trent Richardson and Dez Bryant are going to be just fine. One week will not make or break your season, but there is always room for some roster manipulation. Here are some interesting players available on the waiver wire and some matchup’s that just may put you one step closer to the Sacko Bowl championship.

Start ‘Em 

Quarterback

Terrell Pryor, Oakland Raiders: Pryor put up 20 fantasy points last week as he completed 65 percent of his passes for 217 yards with a TD and two picks. However, Pryor’s real weapon is not his arm, but his legs. Pryor was one of only three players in Week One to top 100 rushing yards, as he put up 112 on the ground. Pryor gets a truly terrible Jaguars team this week, is a solid streamer and worth a roster spot in 2 QB leagues. Somewhere Al Davis is smiling, but most likely he’s looking up not down.

Running Back

Joique Bell, Detroit Lions: Bell racked up 34 fantasy points last week as Reggie Bush’s backup. Probably won’t give your team that much this week, but he is a solid flex play especially in PPR leagues. Also Reggie Bush is already battling a thumb and groin injury. Bell is the handcuff here, Patriots Lifer's. Pick him up if you’re into that sort thing. I’m not judging. Perv.

Wide Receiver

Julian Edelman, New England Patriots: With Danny Amendola likely out with a groin injury, Shane Vereen done for eight weeks with a broken wrist, and Gronk not ready to go yet after 47 surgeries and a Jäger hangover, little Julian will be the big man Thursday against the Jets. After catching seven passes for 79 yards and a pair of touchdowns last week, Edelman will be Tom Brady’s go-to guy. Unless someone bakes Aaron Hernandez a cake with a file in it.

Tight End

Kellen Winslow, New York Jets: Winslow hauled in seven receptions for 77 yards and a touchdown last week and appears to be the Jets only offensive weapon. That’s not saying much, the J-E-T-S S-U-C-K. The Jets will be down big to the Pats this week and Winslow will catch a lot of “garbage time” balls. Garbage Time Balls are also a delicious new snack treat made from recycled luncheon meats. Yum. Available at Cumberland Farms.

Defense/Special Teams

Dallas Cowboys: The ‘Boys D scored 26 fantasy points while giving up 31 real points. Dallas had 3 sacks, 3 picks, 3 fumble recoveries and scored 2 touchdowns. Nice work, Eli. It’s a classic Cowboys and Indians battle this weekend in Kansas City. Jerry Jones has already shipped the Chiefs a pile of small pox infused blankets and a case of firewater.

Kicker

Greg Zuerlein, St. Louis Rams: Legatron (yeah, I’m calling him that and it’s copyrighted so don’t get any ideas) went 4-for-4 on field goals Sunday against the Cardinals. It’s likely a high scoring game, it’s in a dome, and do I have to keep talking about kickers?

Sit ‘Em

Quarterback

Ben Roethlisberger, Pittsburgh Steelers: Big Ben faces a tough Bengals D this week, has lost his starting center, has no running game and Lynn Swan is not returning his calls.

Running Back

Frank Gore, San Francisco 49ers: Gore looked old and slow last week and now he gets to face the young and fast Seahawks defense. Unless Gore has a Picture of Dorian Gray-type secret stashed somewhere, it’s going to be a long day.

Wide Receiver

Roddy White, Atlanta Falcons: I know what you’re thinking? Guru, are you crazy? Hey disembodied voice of Patriots Life readers, I prefer the word “eccentric.” And yes, I know you drafted Rod Roddy as your WR1, but he’s battling a high ankle sprain and won’t be much more than a Matt Ryan decoy. Thanks, Guru, you’re the best. Wanna be friends? Uh, no.

Tight End

Zach Sudfeld, New England Patriots: Mini-Gronk caught zero passes for the Pats last week. That’s two less than this girl. The Sudfeld is a Dudfeld©.

Defense/Special Teams

San Francisco 49ers: I’m not liking this matchup against the Seahawks in Seattle’s Thunderdome. This is why you don’t draft defenses before the last two rounds.

Kicker

Mason Crosby, Green Bay Packers: It’s supposed to snow 37 inches in Green Bay on Sunday. Is that not correct? Let me check with the Patriots Life fact checker. Sorry, she fell asleep when I started talking about kickers.

Good luck this week Patriots Lifer's. Have a FFB question? Hit me up on Twitter @TheGuruGS