Kindly shut up if you think the Patriots are cheating. Stephen A Smith's words, not mine
HOWEVA (Stephan A Smith voice) he's willing to admit the Pats just might be dope. He went on Felger and Mazz on Wednesday and said, "Do I believe they're cheating? No. I believe that they are better than everybody else."
On this point, Stephen A, you and I strongly agree. With all the sports talk shows out there on the air 24/7 I am 99% positive these guys literally don't know or remember what they are saying, ever. Their positions change hour to hour and they say whatever they need to say to get dem ratings.
I'm not about to sit here and say, "Thank you Stephen A! You're on the wall with us!" I'm sure he doesn't even believe this. And I know he's said plenty of anti Pats shit in the past. Do I appreciate these comments? I guess so. But since only jealous peasants think we cheat and I don't concern myself with the opinions of jealous peasants, I can barely give the support of Mr. Smith a second thought.
HOWEVA (second howeva!!) he did go on to say something that I completely agree with.
"And if I'm looking at the New England Patriots . . . I've said this on many occasions and I'm going to say it again: If you're convinced that the New England Patriots are cheating . . . [why] the hell haven't you learned how to cheat like that? Why haven't you figured that out? I mean, according to you, they've only been doing it since 2001. We are now in 2018. Tom Brady has never, ever, ever won less than nine games in a season. And most of the time it's been 10 and above. How many AFC Championship Games have they been to? They've now been to eight Super Bowls. I mean, excuse me. How have you not learned how to cheat like that?"
PREACH! I say this all the time. The difference is Stephen A is telling teams to start cheating like us. Spoiler alert buddy. They already are!!!! Every team is stealing signals. This is a fact. Every team is fucking with air pressure in their balls. This is a fact. Teams are piping in crowd noise. Teams are screwing with the temperature in opponents locker rooms. Everyone is already cheating and we still dick everyone down season after season after season. There is a simple yet eloquent explanation for this. WE ARE BETTER THAN YOU. WE HAVE TOM BRADY. WE HAVE BILL BELICHICK. You want to point the finger at cheaters? Than point that thing right in the mirror, baby. If you want to point your finger at winners, then you know my address. One Patriot Place. That is all.